In 2018, Lily, a fitness enthusiast, embarked on a journey that would change her life forever. Following a trip to Thailand where she experienced seasickness and unusual skin changes, she noticed a lump in her abdomen. After a series of examinations, her diagnosis came: ovarian cancer, stage III. This was a startling revelation after an initial assessment suggested it was only a borderline tumor.
Despite the setback, Lily underwent surgery and completed her treatment, determined not to let cancer define her life. She even found the courage to resume one of her great passions—diving. However, in August 2022, her cancer returned, necessitating a second surgery.
Facing the Reality of a Stoma
In 2023, Lily's situation worsened. A new surgery was required, but this time the doctors told her that the tumor was located too low. They explained, “If you want surgery, you must agree to have a stoma.” Her mind went blank as she tried to process this.
Lily was no stranger to stomas. Her grandfather had lived with a stoma due to rectal cancer nearly three decades ago, and she vividly remembered the experiences. Each time she visited, there was a certain odor in his home. Her grandfather had resented the stoma and refused to clean it himself, which led to depression and a life confined indoors.
Determined to understand her options, Lily consulted with another colorectal specialist. After carefully examining her case, the expert concluded that her condition was already quite fortunate to have a surgeon as skilled as Dr. Wu willing to operate. “You can’t ask for too much,” the expert told her gently. With a heavy heart and thoughts of her young son, Lily realized that her survival mattered above all else. If a stoma was the price, then so be it.
The Aftermath of Surgery
Due to health protocols, only one family member was allowed to visit. Lily's mother waited at the door of the operating room from morning until evening, alone and anxious. When the doctor finally emerged, he informed her that the tumor had been the size of a fist and that creating a stoma was essential to prevent an obstruction.
Lily’s mother listened intently, nodding in agreement, her heart pounding. She fully consented to the stoma procedure and expressed her gratitude to Dr. Wu, bowing repeatedly. But when she saw the blood on his hands, her emotions overwhelmed her, and tears filled her eyes.
When Lily woke up after the surgery, she touched the pouch on her abdomen. She had indeed become someone with a stoma. She never imagined that she would see her own internal organs—red, swollen, and tender, almost like a newborn needing gentle care.
Living with a Stoma and Finding Strength
As Lily adjusted to her new life with a stoma, the reality of daily maintenance set in. A stoma is not only a fresh surgical wound but also one constantly exposed to potential infection due to its function. Initially, complications arose, and it wasn’t until two months after surgery, when the stitches were finally removed, that her skin began to heal.
Meanwhile, her fight was far from over. She endured another six sessions of chemotherapy, including paclitaxel and carboplatin, with the added intensity of bevacizumab. The side effects were brutal: numbness in her hands and feet, a resting heart rate exceeding 120, and intense bone pain that kept her confined to bed. Bleeding became routine, affecting her nose, gums, and even her stoma, as she relied on painkillers and hospital visits to get through each day.
After the final session, her granulocyte count plummeted to a mere 0.4, leaving her barely able to stand. Yet on January 23, 2024, Lily completed her treatment. With each challenge, she realized that her greatest strength lay within her, in a belief that drove her to endure despite the immense pain.
Returning to the Ocean: A Symbol of Freedom
Throughout the ordeal, Lily clung to a vision of freedom. Lying on her hospital bed with curtains drawn, the world outside seemed unreachable. Her longing to dive again felt like a distant dream—after all, she could hardly manage to put on her own socks, entirely dependent on her family’s support. Yet one day, while browsing the internet for information on stoma care, Lily stumbled upon a stoma patient who had returned to diving. This discovery sparked hope within her.
Three months after completing treatment, she went to Sipadan Island. Although her physical strength had yet to fully return and she struggled with numbness in her hands and feet, she was determined to be by the sea again. Gradually, Lily prepared herself. She practiced swimming to restore her sense of balance in the water and tested waterproof stoma care products. With a doctor’s approval, she set out on diving trips to places like Bohol Island and Coron in the Philippines, Tulamben and Nusa Lembongan in Bali, Indonesia. Each dive felt like a reclamation of her life and identity.
Finding Light in the Darkness
Lily’s journey serves as a powerful reminder that disease is but a single chapter in one’s life story. The will to survive and a longing for freedom empowered her to overcome her obstacles. The struggles she faced with her stoma and chemotherapy were painful, but her spirit remained unbreakable. In the dark waters of life, sometimes a faint glimmer of light is all you need to find your way again.
May all free souls meet in the azure expanse.
